Welcome to Dream Interpretation for Dummies, where Dear Abby meets Native Americana. Come to the campfire, peer into the yawning grave, and take a dive into the collective subconscious… or maybe just explore some weird clown imagery. We’ll wait for you here.
Howdy Note: This dream has been very lightly edited. Everything you are about to read has already happened, is happening, will happen…
Another Howdy Note: Bespoke interpretations went/are going well! Hooray! Last post of the year folks. I hope your solstice was full of emotional and physical de-cluttering and you are looking to forward to the year ahead in Dreamland (and otherwise)…
Dear Howdy,
Last night I had the strangest dream. I was standing at the foot of a mountain, about to climb to the top to visit my future self. The mountain seemed short but the walk to the top seemed impossibly far. As I made my way up the winding path a random friend from college popped out of the trees to greet me. He said he knew I was on my way to meet her but wanted to stop me and say hi before I made it there. I'd been thinking about him the other day because I left the friendship kind of unresolved and looking back wasn't the most supportive when it ended. We hugged and I thanked him for everything and then I made it to the top to greet my future self. It was weird because the dream ended the moment she opened her mouth to speak. I hope you have takeaways from this. I can't wait to read the other dreams submitted.
Thanks so much,
Lotte
Dear Lotte,
Thank you for the gift of your dream. Yesterday, I spent the day packing to leave this (very) haunted house. It was a perfect way (in my opinion) to ring in the Winter Solstice. Sure, I did all my usual rituals, too, but I took special care in this. I weighed each object in my hands, sorted through more clothing than I thought possible for local donation, gently stuffed my grandfather’s and mother’s collective tin kitchen collection in a plastic bin. I did this with the intention, yes, to find clarity, to usher in the new, but also to prepare myself to undertake this dream. It is no secret that I’ve been busy, and though I welcome that wholeheartedly, I also have to cultivate the right headspace for wisdom, for imparting it.
Wisely, we hope, into your dream we go: Is there anything more beautiful, more foreboding, than a mountain? I grew up in the foothills of the Ozarks, but I’ve also made my pilgrimage to the homelands of my people, the Blue Smoke (Smoky) Mountains. There I walk-climbed ᎫᏩᎯ panting all the way, thinking about how the medicine people of my tribe used to run straight up to the top after fasting. I didn’t know what I was looking for, not then, but you do. You are to climb this mountain and meet your future self. Simple, really. Or not.
You think you are to undertake this journey alone, but then someone appears. This seemingly random friend from college represents one of the most difficult parts of embracing the Future. He pops up, out of nowhere, to pause your journey (albeit pleasantly). He is an unresolved facet of the past, one that still haunts you, if only occasionally. But a haunting is a haunting, Lotte. And you must set this ghost free before you are to move on.
Your Dreamself makes the right moves, she knows what to do. She thanks this ghost, she embraces them, and allows them to move on, which allows her to keep walking. My advice here is not to seek this former friend out, to ask for his forgiveness (though you could if you feel led), but to forgive yourself in the Waking World. For your mistakes, for the things you should have done. Be gentle with yourself. Look into the Past and remember, but do not linger. The Past is important, of course, but so is the Future. And the Future is where you, and I, and all of us, are headed.
It does not surprise me that your future self withholds secrets, that the dream ends right as she is about to utter what you most want to hear. There are ways to mine the Future, to see ahead, but the hard truth is that everything is always in flux — the path, though it may seem clear, could change given the right circumstances. Rather than clinging to what we know, we must embrace our possibility for change and for growth. It’s the only way out.
I hope this helped. I hope every (metaphorical) mountain you climb brings clarity. I’m sending you a dream of the present, soft-shelled and cozy. There’s a fire maybe, a hot drink. You’ve never felt more at home. Let me know if you get it.
See you on the other side,
Howdy
(Other) Things I Wrote This Year:
Let’s Call It Love — Reborn Dolls and the Internet, Majuscule. (Nonfiction).
Voices of Rebirth: A Reading List on Being Indigenous in America, Longreads. (Nonfiction).
Something about mysticism, Coyote’s Ghost, and being afraid of owls, Scalawag. (Satire).
As an Indigenous Writer, I Push and Protect My Readers, My People, and Myself, Catapult. (Nonfiction).
Life and Death in Strawberry Land, Scalawag. (Nonfiction).
How to Live in a Haunted House, Syllabus Project. (Nonfiction).
In Search of the Origins of Native American Grave Houses in Oklahoma, Atlas Obscura. (Nonfiction).
When the Night is Over — Novel Excerpt, Newfound. (Fiction).
Life Is Not A Novel, Autostraddle. (Nonfiction).
The Unspeakable Shadows of Nightwood, Autostraddle. (Nonfiction).
Love Like Ghosts, The Crawfish. (Nonfiction).
Sweet dreams (are made of memes), AF Weekly.